I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Randomize
