One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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