scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
