Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
