I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
