Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
