its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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