i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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