can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
