True but thats because hes a fetus.
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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