I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
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