im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
my shit smells like andre
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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