i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I have already put on my inside pants.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Randomize
