and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
thus making me awesome and them whores
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
