wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
