Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize
