I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Randomize
