doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
Randomize