it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
