Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I will be naked everywhere
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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