your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
