this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
I just found a bag of teeth...
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Randomize
