her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
You ate ashes out of my bong
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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