Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Holy shit dude........stairs
Randomize
