I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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