So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
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