Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Randomize
