i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize