Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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