He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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