there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
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