Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Randomize
