You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize