I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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