Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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