How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
Randomize
