The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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