evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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