yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
It's rum buckets o'clock
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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