Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize