She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
