I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
