Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize