It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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