beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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