I showed him my bush... on skype.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize