Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Randomize
