i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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