he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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