I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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