LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I just had sex on a roof
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
